Journals and parents

Towards the top of my list of things in life that truly make me happy is writing. This past weekend I rekindled my love for pen and paper (though in this case that expression if used very loosely) and I have determined to not let that flaming torch of love die again! I even bought a beautiful new journal to inspire me to keep it up. I’ve got to if I’m ever going to fulfill my life long goal of writing a book before I die!

So Saturday when I arrived home from purchasing previously mentioned journal, I took a trip down memory lane and began to read through all the journals I’ve kept over the years. At the top of my very first journal entry is not my own handwriting but my dad’s: “12/7/95, Proverbs 7”. When I began flipping through the pages and saw his handwriting over and over again: “What does this verse mean?”, “How can you apply that to your life?” with my responses following, I thought of how of I struggle every morning getting up and making it to work on time with scarcely enough time to eat breakfast or dry my hair and yet how my dad woke up every morning and not only made time for his own devotions with the Lord but to meet with his eight year old daughter and lead her in the Scriptures. For the 20 years I lived at home, he did this nearly every morning. Wow, what a dad I have!

When I finished with that journal, I found another one I began in my late teens with the inscription in the front, “My journey in becoming a woman worth ‘more than rubies’’”. In this journal I recorded Bible verses and quotations from books solely on what it means to be a Godly feminine woman. I started it with the purpose of giving it to my future little girl when she reached adolescence. When I read through the quotes (and feeling like the absolute WORST wife imaginable, wow, I have so far to go! Thank you, Lord, for a patient husband!), I began to think of my mom. Every single verse and quotation seemed to be written about her. My mother didn’t pass on a journal she wrote but her actions every day showed me what it meant to be a submissive wife and a loving mother. Wow, what a mom I have!

In September of 1996 I wrote down a list of prayer requests: “7) Mom and Dad will be better parents. Answered______” I’m convinced now that spot was left blank because it was never answered. My parents did not become better parents. They were and are the absolute BEST parents I could have ever hoped to have! They showed me the way to Christ in their words and deeds every day of my life.

Cold, birthday, and roast

I'm getting sick. I hardly ever, ever get sick so when I do I'm a big baby about it. This morning I woke up with a sore throat and my nose is all stuffy and runny. My boss said I could have off if I felt like I needed it but I'm not at that point yet. I hope to get some Zicam during lunch and kill this little bug before it gets worse!

Tomorrow's my birthday, yay me!! I love birthdays (ok, really just the getting gifts part...cake and icecream is good too). I'm not very happy about this age thing though. Up until this point, getting older was a good thing. I always had a higher age to look forward to. After 21, there's just not a "special" age to count down to. It's all downhill from here. So I have decided I am going to soak up as much 21ness as I can today. I don't know how you can soak up 21ness while sitting at an office but I will think of a way! Boo 22.....Oh well, it's my birthday, I'm getting presents :)

This morning I got up and prepared a roast with onions and potatoes and put it in the oven. It takes 10 hours to cook. It looked so good going in! I can't wait to eat it tonight!

I'm MARRIED!!

Note to all who are about to get married or hope to be married in the future: Make sure you mail off all the necessary paper work as soon as you get back from the honeymoon. You may find after ten months of wedded bliss that you are indeed not "legally" married.

Story: When Chad and I got the marriage license before we were married, we were told after the ceremony and the pastor signs it (which is another story all together), we need to mail back part of the license to the circuit clerk's office. Well...when we got back from the honeymoon, we weren't exactly sure what we did with the license. Once we found it however, I kept forgetting to mail it off. Then, so much time went by that I forgot what parts I was suppose to mail back and I was afraid that I would mail the wrong thing in and too embarrassed to call the circuit clerk and ask. Thus the ten months went by.

Over the past couple of weeks, I've been seriously thinking about finishing up my degree so I realized I need to take care of this matter and get my name changed so we could apply for grants. So I lowered my pride and called Adam's County Circuit Clerk and found out that until they receive the documents, we were not legally married.

Great tidings of great joy: Friday I received my new Social Security card with the name "Tiffany Brooke Jones" written upon it!! Yay, I'm married and share his last name :)

My goals for the first year of marriage:
-Be married - check!
-Change my name - check!
-Get health insurance - in progress
-Not be pregnant - two more months to make it!

Good Friday

To understand the full beauty of the cross, one must go back to the beginning...

(taken from the Westminster Shorter Catechism)

Q9:What is the work of creation?

A: The work of creation is, Gods making all things of nothing, by the word of his power, in the space of six days, and all very good.

Q10:How did God create man?

A: God created man male and female, after his own image, in knowledge, righteousness, and holiness, with dominion over the creatures.

Q11:What are Gods works of providence?

A: Gods works of providence are, his most holy, wise, and powerful preserving, and governing all his creatures, and all their actions.

Q12:What special act of providence did God exercise toward man in the estate wherein he was created?

A: When God had created man, he entered into a covenant of life with him, upon condition of perfect obedience; forbidding him to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, upon pain of death.

Q13:Did our first parents continue in the estate wherein they were created?

A: Our first parents, being left to the freedom of their own will, fell from the estate wherein they were created, by sinning against God.

Q14:What is sin?

A:Sin is any want of conformity unto, or transgression of, the law of God.

Q15:What was the sin whereby our first parents fell from the estate wherein they were created?
A: The sin whereby our first parents fell from the estate wherein they were created, was their eating the forbidden fruit.

Q16:Did all mankind fall in Adams first transgression?

A: The covenant being made with Adam, not only for himself, but for his posterity; all mankind, descending from him by ordinary generation, sinned in him, and fell with him, in his first transgression.

Q17:Into what estate did the fall bring mankind?

A: The fall brought mankind into an estate of sin and misery.

Q18:Wherein consists the sinfulness of that estate whereinto man fell?

A: The sinfulness of that estate whereinto man fell, consists in the guilt of Adams first sin, the want of original righteousness, and the corruption of his whole nature, which is commonly called Original Sin; together with all actual transgressions which proceed from it.

Q19:What is the misery of that estate whereinto man fell?

A: All mankind by their fall lost communion with God1, are under his wrath and curse, and so made liable to all miseries in this life, to death itself, and to the pains of hell for ever.

Q20:Did God leave all mankind to perish in the estate of sin and misery?

A: God having, out of his mere good pleasure, from all eternity, elected some to everlasting life, did enter into a covenant of grace, to deliver them out of the estate of sin and misery, and to bring them into an estate of salvation by a Redeemer.

Q21:Who is the Redeemer of Gods elect?

A:The only Redeemer of Gods elect is the Lord Jesus Christ, who, being the eternal Son of God, became man, and so was, and continueth to be, God and man in two distinct natures, and one person, for ever.

Romans 5:6-11 "⁶For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. ⁷For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— ⁸but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. ⁹Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. ¹⁰For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life. ¹¹More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation."

Very much overdue

We went to St. Louis this past week. Chad was on Spring Break both at RTS and Hinds (where he works) and my boss was traveling for the week so he let me have time off. Oh, it was so much fun!! St. Louis is such a neat place with so much history. I'd much rather just post pictures instead of talk about it but I'm waiting on Chad to upload them to facebook first. He was upset that I posted our honeymoon pictures first so he said he gets these pictures.

So, in other news, I bought my first pregnancy test this past week as well. It was nothing like I imagined. Before that moment, I had lofty dreams of me rushing to the drug store, beaming as I handed my first pregnancy test to the cashier and purchased it. Then I would hurry home, but not quite fast enough, and see the most wonderful sight - two lines! I would then bake Chad an enormous meal, the most delicious one he's even eaten, and tell him the news over dinner. Then he would pick me up and twirl me about and we'd be oh so happy! (Yeah right, we'll probably both have the look of terror on our faces - "us, parents?!")

Instead this experience was nothing but humiliating and horrific. So story begins, I was late. I've been late once before, but this time I was really scared because I had been really nausiated one day that week. We arrive at Chad's parents Wednesday night and of course Chad has to bust out with the news that we're kind of scared I might be pregnant so the whole night Ms. Karen is wanting to take me to Walgreens to buy a test. I didn't want to know, I'd rather continue on in blissful ignorance. But the next morning, when I still hadn't started, I decided it was time. On our way out of town, we stopped at Kroger and bought the dreaded item. I didn't want to take it then. I cried. I did NOT want to find out that there was life inside of me at a Kroger bathroom or even worse a gas station bathroom on the road. I would wait till we got to the hotel.

Somewhere along the Missouri border, I believe it was, Chad woke me up at a rest stop and said he was going to the bathroom. I couldn't wait any longer. I knew we wouldn't be at the hotel till late that night and the whole day I'd be worried sick that I might somehow hurt the baby and not be able to have any fun that afternoon in St. Louis. So, I walked the longest walk of my life - from the car to the reststop. Of course the bathroom had to be full. There was a caravan of elderly ladies, one would go to the bathroom and her friend would wait outside to zip up her pants. Then there was the cleaning lady with her spray bottle waiting for each person to come out then she would clean the toilet. Then there was me with my stick...in a rest stop...only Ecuador's bathroom's compare. I knew I was married and there was certainly nothing wrong me being pregnant, but gah, I felt so cheap! I cried again. Anyway, the story's drug on long enough, I'm not pregnant. Mother nature had come to call so thus my first pregnancy test rests in my purse, in the wrapper, and unused! I told Chad I think we just need to go ahead and have a baby. I can't take five years of this! That's 60 months!

I know, this was probably not the most tasteful thing to write about and I doubt anyone cares, other then the could have been grandparents but this is a huge life moment for me! I bought my first pregnancy test - that's BIG! I feel like I should mark it down on the calender - March 19, 2009. Wow, that's exactly eight months from the day we were married.

So my lunch break is over now. I will try to update more often from now on.

Oh, I forgot! There is exciting news! We landed on a name we both like! Up until the reststop experience, Chad and I were kind of playfully throwing out baby names we liked - well mainly Chad. After a series of absolutely ridiculous names (he's really stuck on "Obi Won", from Star Wars), he out of the blue said that he likes the name "Ethan", which was really exciting because the day before I was at my grandparents eating supper and my grandfather said that his dad's name was Ethan and I was thinking to myself how much I liked that name. So, it's not in stone by any means but it was super exciting that we actually agreed on a name. It took a lot of stress off. Since back in our dating days I've been all stressed out that I'll get pregnant and nine months later when the baby arrives, we still won't have a name! Chad said if I had found out that I was pregnant at the rest stop, if it was a boy we would have named him "Noah" because the name means "at rest" :)

One Word

1. Where is your cell phone? hidden
2. Your significant other? amazing
3. Your hair? blonde
4. Your mother? gentle
5. Your father? protecting
6. Your favorite thing? food
7. Your dream last night? forgot
8. Your favorite drink? lemonade
9. Your dream/goal? godliness
10. What room you are in? office
11. Your hobby? piano
12. Your fear? alligators
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? overseas
14. Where were you last night? hudsons
16. Muffins? blueberry
17. Wish list item? mixer
18. Where you grew up? natchez
19. Last thing you did? texted
20. What are you wearing? dressy
21. Your TV? addiction
22. Your pets? yuck!
23. Friends? away
24. Your life? happy
25. Your mood? hungry
26. Missing some one? someones
27. Car? messy
28. Something you're not wearing? necklace
29. Your favorite store? anthropologie
30. Your favorite color? pink
33. When is the last time you laughed? today
34. Last time you cried? tuesday
35. Who will resend this? clueless
36. One place that I go to over and over? bathroom
37. One person who emails me regularly? mom
38. My favorite place to eat? everywhere!
39. Why you participated in this survey? interested
40. What are you doing tonight? buffy

Oh, I forgot to mention...

My bonus was spent before it even had a chance to get in the bank :( I had to have 4 new tires. Oh well, at least we had the money!